Berkeley, July 25

A bad day. I woke up and cleared my calendar and then went back to bed.

I don’t know what to say. Sometimes it’s all I can do just to take a shower and brush my teeth.

This apathy is breathtaking. It just never ends.

Laying in bed, my thoughts wandered back to April when J and I stood overlooking the Seine’s right bank from our VRBO’s floor-to-ceiling windows. It was our last night in Paris and I tossed my only remaining Euro from the Ile St. Louis apartment, watching as it was engulfed by the pulsing water below, alight by the overarching pont.

I made a wish as one would upon a birthday candle then and I remember it now. Will always remember it.

I hope I survive.